


Broken Promises

by ReverseSirens



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Death, M/M, and like it focuses on the death, but the death isnt graphical or anything if that makes sense, it's a huge part of the story, the death isn't really spoken about?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 22:29:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9093235
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReverseSirens/pseuds/ReverseSirens
Summary: Bokuto is dying and Akaashi doesn't know. 
He promises Bokuto not to cry, the promise is broken.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This was in my 'notes' for a LONG LONG while. I couldn't figure stuff out and then i was too pussy to post this but at last it is here. Lmao, enjoy.

"Hi." The voice says from the speakers in the laptop. The face is smiling but not the usual joy-filled smile that Akaashi has come to love over the year and a half. No. The smile is just there to hide the pain that Akaashi can clearly see radiating from Bokuto. Akaashi could clearly see the black bags under his eyes showing the lack of sleep Bokuto had been experiencing. Akaashi hadn't seen him in person since around a few months ago. Probably seven months ago. No one but Kuroo knew where he was but Kuroo refused to tell Akaashi and six months ago he said that Bokuto didn't want to see Akaashi ever again. That kind of broke Akaashi. He stopped trying to see the older boy. He had noticed how the boy had been weird over face time and how he spoke less and less, seeming to have been falling into a daydream every couple minutes. He seemed distant. Almost like a different person. Now Akaashi knew why.

Akaashi was sat on his bed, his knees under him as he looked at the screen that showed the beautiful boy. Tears were already welling up in Akaashi's eyes but he wouldn't cry. He couldn't. He promised.

"I know what you must be thinking. Bokuto, how do you manage to look so good even with your hair down?" Akaashi chuckled as his hand went to with lips. His sleeves were pulled over the palms of his hands, only showing a bit of his fingers. "It's because I'm just so great and mighty.

"Okay, so I don't have long before...ya know." Akaashi nods, swallowing his whimper back. Not now. Not here.

"I just want to explain some things but before I do I need you to promise me something, okay?" Akaashi nods. He decides it's best to sit cross legged. It'd be more comfortable.

"Okay, cool. So as long as you promise to not cry and to not get sad I will tell you, is that good?" Akaashi takes in a deep breath. He can't keep that promise. "Now don't worry if you can't keep that promise. Just try your best." And so Akaashi does. He tries his best.

"So you must have already heard. I'm dying! Ha, here's a life tip, don't ignore doctors when they say you are dying because you'll just get worse. But basically the thing that's killing me is Fatal familial insomnia which I will be referring to as FFI. I don't want to go into detail about what it is and stuff but I will say that you usually get it around the age of 18 to the age of 60. I got it at the age of sixteen. A pretty rare case to be honest. I found out in March two thousand and fourteen which left me with a bit to live, Now I only have just over six months, almost seven, left of my life but that may either get shorter or longer. I have to make this video now because I know that if I don't then I'll never be able to tell you this." Bokuto was tearing up and Akaashi was trying hard to fight his own tears back.

"I had to tell Kuroo to tell you I don't want to see you because otherwise you'd have to see me like this. You'd have to see me weak, see me in pain. I didn't want you to think any less of me. I wanted to be the strong senpai you always looked up to even though I know that wasn't the case a majority of the time. It was nice believing though, you know? Okay. So. Akaashi, if you want to know something I'll tell you. Do you want to know?" Akaashi quickly nodded his head as he kept his breath in to keep his tears and any noises back. He wasn't getting sad, no. He was getting angry because the one person he wanted in his life forever was saying so many bad things about himself and he was dying. He was dead. Akaashi never ever stopped thinking of Bokuto as a strong person, he never would stop thinking like that. The fact that Bokuto had to go through that, mostly alone as well, just made him think better of his senpai.

"I thought so, here it goes. You were my favourite kouhai." Pause. "You always will be. I trusted you the most, well, maybe you were tied with Kuroo but that's only because he is like a brother to me and I love him, man, ya feel? Anyway, that's not all I have to say. Akaashi? Please don't forget to smile. Do it. Go on. Right now. Smile. Please. For me." And so Akaashi does. He smiles, through the pain and the anger as he made Bokuto's wish come true. "I'm so bummed out I can't see it. I bet you look as beautiful as ever." Bokuto's own smile was faltering with each word.

"Fuck, Akaashi," The owl boy's voice was getting thick as the words left his lips. "I really did love you. Take it whatever way you want because whatever way you take it is probably true." Tears. "Man, you made me so happy but you also made me so sad and angry and I don't know why. I'm sounding so cheesy right now, wow."

Akaashi still managed to keep his tears away even as he saw Bokuto cry. "Okay, I have a few more things to say before I show you something. First, make sure to take care of the team because they can't do it on their own and you'll be the new captain so it will be your duty, okay? Second, get yourself a owl and name it after me otherwise I will haunt your ass. The final thing I will leave for later." Suddenly pictures of Bokuto with Akaashi and many others as well flooded the screen. A familiar song played in the background. Blanco by ROSSO. Akaashi's favourite song. Bokuto hated it. But. He still put it in the video. For Akaashi.

As the song started to fade out along with the picture of mainly Bokuto secretly taking pictures with Akaashi, a new video started. It was of Bokuto. He was making silly faces, laughing and talking to none other than Akaashi himself. Akaashi saw himself walk up behind Bokuto, he remembered this day. It was at Akaashi's house and they were watching a film but Akaashi needed to get food so he went to get it and while he was out Bokuto started recording himself. Akaashi leaned his chin on Bokuto's shoulder, asking what was going on. Bokuto replied with, "I want you to have something to remember me by." Then Akaashi walked away confused and called Bokuto over to sit with him. Bokuto whispered a quick "Love you, Keiji." And Akaashi almost cried. Almost. He had to stop himself because he promised. Twice now.

Next was a video of Akaashi and Bokuto again. They were walking from practice. Akaashi also remembered this day. He remembered the next three videos but then a video he never saw came up. It was Bokuto playing guitar. "I learned how to play this song just for you." Always With You from Spirited Away starts playing from the guitar. Bokuto isn't bad, Akaashi wonders how long it took him to master that. How did he even know Akaashi liked Spirited Away that much? Has Akaashi said so? If so, he didn't remember. The lyrics were also being sang by Bokuto. He was kind of off and a bit shaky but Akaashi still love it. Tears were forming in his eyes but no. He made a promise.

"Do you remember those videos?" Bokuto's voice said after five minutes of Bokuto singing and leaving a small message about how he heard Akaashi talk about No Face one time and how he looked up to Haku for some reason. Then he said that Chihiro was a better role model. Akaashi was ready to fight. Both Bokuto and the tears that were threatening to escape.

"Finally. I want you to rewatch this whenever you are sad to make you stop being sad. I love you, Keiji." And the video ends. With the last words replaying in his mind, Akaashi can feel the tears leaving him. He roughly wipes them away. He can't even keep a simple promise. He failed Bokuto.

"You idiot. This just makes me even more sad." He says as he starts to sob. He keeps trying to wipe the tears away but all that does is triggers the next set of tears. And then the next set of tears come round after he accepts that he has failed the boy. The boy who never lived to eighteen. The boy who died too early, both in the eyes of the doctors and in Akaashi's own eyes. The boy who Akaashi never got to say, "I love you too, Koutarou." To.

**Author's Note:**

> [ Tumblr ](http://dominatedbylife.tumblr.com/)   
> [ Twitter ](https://twitter.com/thydominator)   
>  talk to me on tumblr and twitter if you like


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